On April 1, a caller on Broadway said she saw a male and a female teenager nude in the parking lot of the former St. Matthew's School. The caller stated that the boy had been wearing a red-and-black jacket the the girl had been dressed in dark shorts and a pink top, but that they disrobed were now "fooling around" naked.
Sgt. Anthony Gentile arrived at the scene and the youths fled...apparently with their clothes on. Gentile said he found two teenagers he believed to be the formerly-unattired frolickers in the VFW park a few minutes later, and confirmed that they were juveniles from Hastings. They were warned not to pull such shenanigans in the future and sent on their way.
If you do want to be naked among other people, find a list of "social nudist places in North America" here. Note Hastings is not one.
Also this week—though less amusing:
March 28:
- A woman came to headquarters to report that after attempting to file her taxes online she learned from her accountant that someone had already filed taxes in her name. Police gave the 74-year-old ID theft victim the numbers of all credit reporting agencies. Detective are investigating. "I have never seen an ID theft case in which someone has filed tax returns in someone else's name before," said Hastings Lt. Dvid Dosin.
March 29:
- Another resident came to headquarters to report that someone had filed a tax return in her name. It's unknown who filed them or when it happened. Police said that the IRS is aware of the situation.
- Police received a call about an accident involving a pedestrian. Police arrived on the scene and requested an ambulance as well; the car involved was a 2008 Ford van. The victim refused medical attention.
March 30:
- A caller on Circle Drive reported youths "skating dangerously" in the road "in danger of being hit by a car." Police advised the kids "to skate carefully and avoid vehicles." Police also confirmed that the skaters had all necessary safety equipment.
- At around 8 p.m., a Rose Street resident reported that she believed her neighbor had thrown rock salt over the fence into her yard. The caller also slipped in that she believed her neighbor was selling marijuana out of his house. Police said they'd talk to the neighbor the following day. There was no evidence of pot or salt, so nothing became of it.
- At 10:30 p.m. the fire department and police were dispatched for an alarm on Warburton. Turns out it was triggered by steam from a hot shower.
March 31:
- A resident reported that two hanging baskets had been removed from the front of his house and thrown into the street. The baskets were estimated to be worth $15 each. The man also reported that a neighbor's Adirondack chair had been thrown into the street.
April 1:
- Police received calls from two separate people on Warburton at around 1:15 a.m. about a woman—most likely intoxicated—wielding a stick and vandalizing cars. Police confirmed that the 41-year-old resident was drunk and irate. She was transported via ambulance to St. Johns Riverside hospital's emergency room. The owner of the damaged car was contacted, but he declined to press charges. No arrests were made.